Trust.

I guess this post is something i never really wanted to post about, but i cannot put my finger to why i just want the remember this shitty period that i went through it, and still going through. I would say.

It all started from a week after my birthday week, so that week was a disaster; I felt like a total jinx to every single one around me. On that week's monday, i got reprimanded by my ballet teacher for not being a good senior guiding my juniors. I felt demoralised, i felt like i failed as a leader, i failed as a senior after that. Of course i broke down, with my dance buddy when she never does.. On that week's tuesday morning, i had math lesson, but i lost my TYS (ten year series) and i got scolded by my math teacher, again; I felt like i failed as a person. During that period, i fought with a very close of mine and i really felt like as if the world was crumbling down on me.

That week again, Wednesday. I left my wallet on the taxi on the way to school in the morning. But i thank god for sendjaja, who stayed with me throughout to actually find back my wallet. Ahhh, so grateful to her..
Then Thursday, i couldnt stand it anymore. I went to have a talk with Ms Lye, who was my most trusted teacher i've ever had in my life. I calmed down instantly after a 2 hour talk with her.

Yes this, :')

After that shitty week and a talk with Ms Lye and of course not forgetting my best friend, Sai. I decided to just focus on the many little things that made me happy.

Then there it was my CNY celebration, I went to my aunt's house for the reunion and we had hotpot! (: I then saw my lil'prince and my lil'princess that i love love so much.

my lil'prince charming

my lil' princesssssssss

my little brendan was my joypill :*

and yep, this is my family. :)

Second day, we stayed home and made hotpot and bbq ourselves hehe since we had no one else to visit in singapore. :)))) But we still got $300 hongpao :* Third day, we went to bugis for a shopping trip as it was super boring to stay homeeeee. ): hehe.

swag bleh.

Then last day of holiday which was a monday, i went out with my woman; sendjaja to get pressies for our two friends who had the same birthday and same birthday with my dad hehe. We went to scape first and we intended to go to bugis but ended up going to plaza sing since it was nearer & i got a surprise cake for my dadsie. hehe. i love my woman, she's the silliest friend i've ever had in my life. :')

cos we simply do not care about how people think of us.

Then i thought Tuesday which was my dadsie birthday, it was gonna be a good day....

when i reached school, one of my best friend, a friend i thought i would always trust.. i wont say her name. She dragged me to a side and she confessed that she had been lying to me all this while, Her everything, i hated people who lies to me to the core. She knew that. Yet.. Sigh, when i heard her story; i blanked out. My mind went black. I didn't know what to do, then soon time by time; i heard my other friends talking about her. My first thing that came to my mind was, " I'm such a pathetic friend, i thought we were best friends yet i wasn't worth any of her trust. " 

I was one of the last person to know about it. I was pissed but i guess it was more to the disappointing side. I asked her why did she had to do that, she told me she was scared we, who was her close friends would leave her.. I do not know if you will read this but, if you didnt want to lose us. why do you lie to us? how can you pretend like nothing happened when i asked you if you kept anything from me. I clearly remembered, i kept asking you and you told me these exact words,

"Really nothing, Zune TRUST ME." Yes i trusted you, and now what i feel is just betrayal and disappointment. Every time i thought of what she did, every time i sees her, i do not know what to do, and how to help her exactly in any way i can. How useless i am. Do i still help her or should i just leave her alone. This wasnt her first time doing this..

How can you hurt so many people around you, just for your own sake. How can you just treat your friends like this, treat them like this. You've changed back to someone whom i thought you were two years ago. I thought you've changed. People are judging you yes. But i do not know what i can do for you anymore.. Instead of getting pissed at you for lying to me, this time; i went blank. Does that mean i had given up on you? Does that mean i had given up on our friendship..? i dont know myself..

I promised i wouldnt leave you alone no matter what situation but i really do not know how to help you anymore if you keep lying to me... Everyday i find out something that you hid from me, the next day only when i asked you, then you'll tell me the truth.. Is this called best friends..? no, this just shows we're not even friends.
Why had you became like this. Just why.

Sigh.. alright. Happy moments now. :') Afternoon, i didnt go for chinese isp and went for my dadsie's birthday dinner at Jumbo near the riversidee..? The food there was deliciousssssss. 

whole familia.

me with mommy and daddy.

super duper cute little boyfriend.

Happiest45th Birthday Daddy!
yes, daddy's girl ftw.

\

broke out my new blazer for the dinner.


Lights out.